Part 2 of a two-part series
By Susan Cramm

Part 1 of this article discussed the unfortunate reality that over one-half of working professionals surveyed¹ aren't living a balanced life and that corporate leaders are in denial or believe that policies that address work-life balance issues impede competitiveness. Since answers are not going to come from above, it's up to those in the unbalanced majority to help resolve work-life balance issues — for themselves and for those whom they lead.

Here's an e-mail I received recently from a woman named Jean (a pseudonym) that describes the work-life balance dilemma perfectly:

It's tragic to work hard for many years — to have missed out on what matters most and be left without a clue as to what to do next. On the surface, it would appear that successful professionals like Jean have all the work-life balance tools they need — organizational and financial — to take control of their lives.

From an organizational perspective, they are in positions where they shape plans, define work commitments and schedules, and delegate to others. They should also have the financial security necessary to define their boundaries — to say "yes" or "no" and, if necessary, find alternative employment if their needs do not synch with those of the enterprise.

In reality, the near-frenetic demands of business and personal life bring many of these professionals to their knees. They find themselves exhausted by the end of the day and unable to gain the perspective necessary to plan, manage, or delegate. On the urgent/important time management dimensions, they are caught servicing the urgent and unable to ascertain the important.

The First Step to Work-Life Balance

For Jean, and everyone else in similar situations, the first step to achieving work-life balance is to say "no" and find some time to think things through. Saying "no" doesn't require using the word "no"; it means setting priorities, attending to them and delegating or deferring the rest while blocking "think time" on the calendar.

You can start the thinking process by examining your values and developing clarity on how you define success. In his book "Living a Life That Matters," Rabbi Harold Kushner writes that "our souls are split, part of us reaching for goodness, part of us chasing fame and fortune." As we strive for fame and fortune — the need to feel significant and important — we find ourselves neglecting our families, and while we don't like it, we tell ourselves we have no choice.

As we get older or experience loss or trauma, many of us realize that the tradeoff between significance and goodness is too great and our values shift accordingly. This is the fundamental tension for many people experiencing work-life balance issues — they want to create a more significant life, but only those who value "goodness" over "significance" will be able to exert the discipline necessary to change their lives.

Stop Chasing an Impossible Dream

Jean is clearly struggling with defining success and the implications to her career. Many "work-life moaners" (to use Jack Welch's vernacular) wish for balance with little or no negative impact to careers — an almost impossible dream when success is defined by identity with a particular company, title, and money. For example, turning down relocation opportunities usually limits vertical career growth (within the same company, at least).

Job sharing, as profiled in a February 2005 Harvard Business Review article, "Two Executives, One Career," may result in retaining one's position and title, but at lower pay. And starting your own company or working for yourself may be financially beneficial, but usually results in loss of organizational status.

If, from a values perspective, you are ready to define success based on subjective factors, including family, independence, variety, giving to others, etc., you need to get your finances in order. This may mean figuring out how to live on less and saving money to fund a possible transition. Work-life balance requires changes that demand negotiation with current or future employers. Negotiations are much more productive if both sides understand that either has the power to walk away.

With a financial plan in place, it's time to figure out what you want to do more of and what is standing in the way. Write a list of work activities that give you energy (where the time melts away) as well as those that zap energy, and rate how well your current job feeds your soul. Next, make a list of what you want to do more of, less of and keep the same.

If you love your job, but it's too much of a good thing (in terms of work hour requirements), define some boundaries (having breakfast with the kids, amount of travel, frequency of exercise, getting home for dinner) and figure how much time is needed to "buy back" with improved time management, delegation, and managing up.

Don't ask for permission or tell people "no," just clearly articulate what you can do and when — the work-life balance motto being, "don't complain, don't explain." If your current position requires more than you can give, leverage your equity with your employer (you have more than you think if you have performed well over a number of years) to move into a lateral (or reduced) position, or to negotiate job sharing, contracting, or part-time work.

Work-Life Balance Is an Individual Responsibility

If you don't love your job, move on — either within the company if you have a good reputation and relationship, to another company, or on your own. Making a career shift is extremely difficult due to the personal introspection, planning, and execution required. If you decide to go this route, it's a good idea to retain a career coach to help you understand your personality and motivators, assess your talents, skills, and knowledge, develop career goals and business plans, and market yourself.

As we look into the future, the work-life balance dilemma is going to change as organizations strive to replace the linear career path ("a path to the top") with non-linear career paths that make sense in delayered, downsized, and outsourced organizations.²

In the meantime, however, the responsibility for work-life balance resides with the individual. It is possible for those who understand that "the path to a truly successful and significant life is through friendship, family, and acts of generosity and self-sacrifice"³ to have the courage to manage their careers and discipline themselves to live below their means.

About Susan Cramm
Susan Cramm is the founder and president of Valuedance, a coaching firm in San Clemente, California, that assists executives in formulating their strategic agenda and supporting organizational, process, and technology plans. Working primarily one-on-one, Cramm applies her expertise in strategic planning, executive leadership, investment analysis information technology, and change management to realign leadership practices towards a more tightly focused and well-coordinated agenda.

Cramm is the former CFO and executive vice president at Chevys Mexican Restaurants. Prior to Chevys, Cramm held the positions of CIO and vice president of the Information Technology Group and senior director of strategic and financial planning at Taco Bell Corporation.

Susan Cramm is a recognized industry expert on IT leadership and coaching. She is a frequent speaker at industry conferences and published writer. For more information about Susan and her views, see www.valuedance.com and www.cio.com, for which she writes the monthly "Executive Coach" columns.

Susan received her master's degree in management from Northwestern University, specializing in finance, marketing, and quantitative methods.

¹ CIO Magazine, Sept. 17, 2002, "IT Careers and Work-Life Balance"; Fast
   Company, July 1, 1999, "Results From How Much is Enough."
² Journal of Organizational Behavior, "Conceptualizing and Evaluating Career
   Success," Peter Heslin.
³ "Living a Life That Matters," Harold Kushner, First Anchor Books, 2001.